Can You See Me?

Peering through the foliage of life

Hello

Well some of you may recall that late last year I spoke about doing a big reveal in 2011 here on my blog. I hadn't done this to date as my courage had faltered. Look I am not even sure if people will be that interested. May be it is more for my own benefit than any one else's.

When I started this blog it was my intention to talk about what I was doing creative wise, as in sewing & quilting. 
I also wanted to eventually discuss the big job I had in front of me which is to become healthy.
 
I firstly I wanted to build up some sort of street cred.:)
I wanted to be known for all other things before revealing that I  have a massive weight issue that is robbing me of living my life to its fullest potential. So bad in fact that I am confined to my home for the majority of time, and any trips outside the home are huge ordeals and result in a lot of discomfort for me and hard work for those helping me.

In deciding to talk in public about my struggle with excessive body weight I realise that I open myself up for all types of comments and I accept that, and will deal with that with my internal wisdom.

Now I know that the people who know me and even those I am yet to meet in person would not think of me any less.

So the question could be asked why even bother writing about this issue then?
Well I guess for me it is about becoming seen. By this I mean even at my size I want to be seen for the whole package that is me. For the joy I find in life, the love I give to my family & friends and my new found creativity.

I am imperfect.
I am compassionate.
I am vulnerable.
And I am enough.


I came across Brene Brown some time ago now and found this TED talk she gave, have a listen and see what you think. Now I would love to hear what you think so please leave me a note.

I could probably write on and on, but don't want to bore you too much yet. I wont be banging on about this part of me all the time but now I can talk about other bits of my life and you will have a better understanding where I am coming from.
That's if your even interested-quite presumptuous aren't I?


Ciao





 

Simple Abundance & Quilt love

 

This is what is making me smile, petunias grown by the bloke hanging out

on the patio

I can't remember the names of these little beauties

More pretties

Now here is one of my small quilts that I commenced one maniacal Sunday arvo.

I had been looking at this bunch of 1930's reproduction fabrics for some time, trying to work out what I would sew with them. After seeing this solid grey fabric on so many quilting blogs I purchased some and then it hit me I would combine the two of these and see what I ended up with.

This is it.

Not too bad.

I like it.

The photos don't do it justice.

True, not just saying that.

Another view taken in the hallway,

still not too clear is it?

Here is a lovely little

cushion I made from a new book

called Simplify, by Camille Roskelley

one of my favourite designers.

I am not so good with making pillow

and cushion backs but these instructions

were Jan friendly. :)

Yeh-I did it.

Success.

Yet another go at draping this quilt

creatively.

Epic fail!

This is a ruin at Kunanalling, approx 60 kms from Kalgoorlie W.A

In it hey day it was a popular watering hole

called The Premier Hotel.

If only those walls could talk.



Hanging over the car door

 yes he does try hard for me.

Love ya bloke. :)

We have had this new beaut camera for about 12 months I think and we are yet to take one really great picture of any of my quilts. I have read the books, asked advice and yet still we are just not getting it right.

I read so many blogs and their pictures are awesome. I want mine to look like theirs do.

Why is it so hard? If anyone has any tips for me that just might save my sanity, or preserve what is left. :)

If I must look for a positive it could be that while the pics are not as clear as I would like they are concealing the little oopsies I make. :)

Take care

Jan

Goals & Dreams

Lovely gerberas

As the post title suggests each year I have a list of goals and dreams that I hope to achieve over the year. I will share them with those people who are involved in my life so they can see if they can come on board to help me achieve them.

This year's are similar to 2010's goals, I suppose what you could call recurrent goals and dreams.

They are:

On the health front

1. Continue to work on my health. This will involve continuing to have regular medical appointments and seeing other health professionals as needed. I need to confront my fears in this regard and allow myself to accept their help. (I don't like the dentist)

2. Continue to have 6 small meals per day. These meals will be as nutritionally balanced and tasty as we can make them, and not go above the 2000 calorie per day limit.

3.Continue to explore new foods and try new recipes.

4. Leave the house more. Now this is a biggie for me, due to several reasons. However with planning and foresight could be doable.

5. Continue my search for peace and authenticity. And allow myself to be vulnerable so that I may receive all that is coming my way.

Writing Goals

Endeavour to write often and better. Journal my family of origin details so that the girls will know a little more of their roots. A friend gave me a great bunch of questions to help me to know what to write. She also gave me a pretty journal to record it all in too. Thanks Sue.


Sewing Goals

Well of course it is to sew more.
Use my stash of fabric, and limit fabric buying, even though  the dollar value in the USA is great right now.

Be more adventurous and take risks with new designs. After all what is the worse that can happen? Some fabric might need to be discarded? Well worse things happen at sea, as the saying goes.

I will have many more goals as the year goes on but this enough for now.
I have been in an energy slump, hence the gap in posts.

I did intend to put up some photos of what I have been doing lately but someone has misplaced the lead for the camera. And no it wasn't me, it was the youngest member of the family.

                                                

Practice makes things better, well I can hope

You know, sometimes I find it hard to express myself

eloquently.

Never the less it doesnt stop me from saying or writing stuff, and I do hope that I can improve as time goes on.

So with that in mind, I was going to tell you that this year one of my goals, and note I said goals and not resolutions, ços I don't make them, is to write more.

More blogging and more personal journalling.

For such a long time I have felt stymied, blocked dried up even.

But I have so much I want to tell you, so much to say.

I have many ideas rambling around inside my head. Now I want to put it out there. Let others see what I think about. Might be a bit scary though. :)

Anyway, I will be back, I want to tell you something, just working out the best way to do it. It might not happen with my next post, but it will happen and soon as I wrote last year.

I want my writing to flow like this creek

Looks can be decieving

One could be forgiven for thinking that I am sewing seeing I have posted photos of my sewing machine. Alas that is not the case. :(

These pics were taken when I first got this baby and I completed my youngest daughters quilt on her. She sewed it effortlessly I might add, I know I have told you this before.

See I was all set to work on my chook table runner, had all the bits out and needed to fuse them to the background fabric, then I noticed that some beaks were missing and that would require me to locate the fusible web and re-do all that again. Then I found I didn't have all the stuff to do the nests for the setting chooks. Ohhh well then my energy ran out so I packed it all up into it's little bag.

Do others get like this.

I am so very tired and lethargic and it frustrates me so much to not be able to carry through on projects. I am trying to learn to accept that this is life for now, but eventually I hope to regain some energy and enthusiasm.

What do you do when days like this strike?